Porn Reviews

THE CUMMENTARY’S HALLOWEEN HOWLER

Halloween is the hottest holiday of the year: Skin is showing, booze is flowing, and inhibitions are low. To celebrate the occasion, I typed “Halloween” into PornHub’s search bar, and over 1100 titles came up. Luckily for you, I spent the entire weekend watching all of them, and have picked my favourites for you here.

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Porn Reviews

FREAKY FRIDAY: Cam Soda’s Big Ass Latina Teen Chased by Lesbian Loving T. Rex on Hoverboard then Fucked

This very exciting premise fails to live up to its potential, as it falls victim to repetition. I give this misguided live-cam adventure one half-hard dino dick, with bonus points awarded for creativity.

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Porn Reviews

FOREIGN FILM FRIDAY: Cum Louder’s “Fucking with the Cook in the Middle of the Restaurant”

If you’re not a fan of subtitles, the comedic touches make up for them in this voyeuristic restaurant romp. I give this film one fresh (not frozen) gilt-head bream and several health code violations.

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Porn Reviews

THIRSTY THURSDAY: Nubile Films’ Tension

Holly Michaels and Bruce Venture prove that you don’t need any fancy bells and whistles to create effective spank bank material. I give this mid-morning romp one stiff cup of morning joe, extra milk. Continue reading “THIRSTY THURSDAY: Nubile Films’ Tension”

Porn Reviews

VIXEN Eva Lovia’s Most Intense Scene

Good backstory, breathtaking cinematography, AMAZING tights. 5 fingers way in.

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