Sex Q&A

Sex Q&A: An Adventure into Ass Play

Dear The Cummentary,

I know my man loves a finger in the bum, but we either have to be drunk, or I have to be sneaky about it in order to make it happen. Is there a way I can get him to open up about his love of bum play that won’t make him feel ASShamed?* Continue reading “Sex Q&A: An Adventure into Ass Play”

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Sex Q&A

Sex Q&A: My Boyfriend Won’t Go Down On Me

Dear The Cummentary,

I have been dating my boyfriend for about a year, and he won’t go down on me! He did a couple times at the beginning of the relationship (mind you, very briefly), but he has now stopped altogether. I think this is a very important aspect of a sexual relationship, and it’s one of the only ways I can achieve an orgasm. Help!

Continue reading “Sex Q&A: My Boyfriend Won’t Go Down On Me”

Porn Reviews

THE CUMMENTARY’S HALLOWEEN HOWLER

Halloween is the hottest holiday of the year: Skin is showing, booze is flowing, and inhibitions are low. To celebrate the occasion, I typed “Halloween” into PornHub’s search bar, and over 1100 titles came up. Luckily for you, I spent the entire weekend watching all of them, and have picked my favourites for you here.

Continue reading “THE CUMMENTARY’S HALLOWEEN HOWLER”

Porn Reviews

BAEB’s Leah Gotti Seduces Photographer

This aesthetically pleasing, ballet-themed fuck fest keeps me feeling hot and bothered from beginning to end. Leah Gotti shows us First, Second, and Third Position in a way Swan Lake never could.

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Porn Reviews

FREAKY FRIDAY: Cam Soda’s Big Ass Latina Teen Chased by Lesbian Loving T. Rex on Hoverboard then Fucked

This very exciting premise fails to live up to its potential, as it falls victim to repetition. I give this misguided live-cam adventure one half-hard dino dick, with bonus points awarded for creativity.

Continue reading “FREAKY FRIDAY: Cam Soda’s Big Ass Latina Teen Chased by Lesbian Loving T. Rex on Hoverboard then Fucked”

Porn Reviews

FOREIGN FILM FRIDAY: Cum Louder’s “Fucking with the Cook in the Middle of the Restaurant”

If you’re not a fan of subtitles, the comedic touches make up for them in this voyeuristic restaurant romp. I give this film one fresh (not frozen) gilt-head bream and several health code violations.

Continue reading “FOREIGN FILM FRIDAY: Cum Louder’s “Fucking with the Cook in the Middle of the Restaurant””

Porn Reviews

THIRSTY THURSDAY: Nubile Films’ Tension

Holly Michaels and Bruce Venture prove that you don’t need any fancy bells and whistles to create effective spank bank material. I give this mid-morning romp one stiff cup of morning joe, extra milk. Continue reading “THIRSTY THURSDAY: Nubile Films’ Tension”